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I wouldn’t say time heals, just that life gets more bearable

Blog
15/10/2018

💙This is straight from the heart💙

I will never forget the day I skipped into the sonography room for my 12 week scan. Eagerly awaiting pictures of my second child, I lay down for the sonographer to work her magic and let me see my baby.

However when the sentence ‘Is your other child is normal?’  is uttered by your trusted healthcare professional, your whole world starts to spin quite uncontrollably.

Jacob grew his angel wings at 23 weeks with a rare congenial heart condition and took a piece of my heart with him.

My husband and I unfortunately received no support from the hospital and I remember many a night just looking out of my bedroom window into nothingness. We were left to work things out for ourselves with just our friends and family to lean on and listen when needed.

Our saving grace though was our, then 2 year old, son Alex who kept us going and if it wasn’t for him just being him I don’t know how my husband and I would have coped. Alex knows how thankful we are because I tell him, often.

I was lucky enough to fall pregnant again a few months after and Elena was born healthy and bouncing. I do like to think that her personality is strong and wild enough for two people!

We often talk about Jacob together as he is an important part of me and my family and will never be forgotten.

I know I’m not the only woman to have lost a child so why did it feel like I was? It took a while for others to open up and make me realise that I wasn’t alone, that it IS ok to talk about baby loss and it IS ok to feel upset about it.

It still makes me cry to talk about Jacob, so it is with tears that I write this blog at the end of Baby Loss Awareness Week. But I am o.k. And I will be o.k. tomorrow and the day after that too. 😊

I am a proud mother of 3 children and that is something I will always cherish and never forget 💕

Sending love, hugs and kisses to all who need it 😘

Kelly, Bristol North and South Glos #blaw2018 #itsgoodtotalk #sands

Bristol North & South Gloucestershire

One response to “I wouldn’t say time heals, just that life gets more bearable”

  1. Holly says:

    Oh Kelly, this bought tears to my eyes. I’m so sorry for you and your loss. “Time heals” is one of my most hated phrases. It’s insulting. You don’t get “better” you just learn to live with the pain.
    I miscarried before I had Noah. I was only a few weeks along, so I never had a scan, never knew the sex and have nothing to show for it other than a big lump in my throat and a little hole in my heart. I received no help, no support or offer of anything at all from the hospital other than some words that still ring in my ears; “think of it as a heavy period!” So wrong. Thank you for sharing. Lots of love to you, a fellow mum of 3… our angels in the sky will always be with us.
    Hol xxx

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