Go home and take care of your kid!!


Disclaimer: I am not the world’s biggest Chery Fernandez – Tweedy – Cole fan. That said, I feel the need to jump to her defence this week. And not just because she’s released some absolute belters and owns a perfect set of dimples. She’s a mum and to be honest, I’m a bit sick of mums being told they can’t do things that women who don’t have children, can. Or that MEN can!  Honestly, I’m absolutely staggered at the backlash she has received over her recent X factor performance. She appears to have angered up the old farts out there who seem to believe that once a woman becomes a mum, she can’t be sexy anymore. A few years ago her performance may have ruffled feathers, but I seriously doubt that it would have garnered 200 complaints to Ofcom. I also doubt whether people would be expecting her to quit singing just because her single had flopped.

Go home!

Apparently, now that she is a mum she should just be at home looking after her kid. Presumably she should be knitting some booties and baking cakes whilst she’s at it? Why was her performance so much worse than the likes of Little Mix? They too are often seen prancing around in latex and grabbing at their nether regions. Are they allowed to do this because they don’t have children? It can’t be an age thing because I guarantee if Kylie was up their in her gold hot pants then she would be applauded! (Disclaimer: I bloody love Kylie!)

Leave her alone!

I know old Chezza winds people up. Let’s not forget her incident in the bogs a few decades ago, when she was charged with assaulting a bathroom attendant. Let’s also not forget that time she forgave her cheating husband (that silly cow – how dare she!?) Nor her generally happy and smug little face on the X factor. Oh, and then she went and got married and divorced a bunch of times and shacked up with a man-child from One Direction! The horror! Leo Dicaprio regularly fornicates with women half his age and nobody bats an eyelid but when a woman does it… stop the press! Fast forward a few years and Cheryl had obviously had enough of being ridiculed and judged, so hid away for a year whilst pregnant. But still she couldn’t win. She was criticised for disappearing!! Her recent return to the spotlight was always going to be a big deal to the British media and public, who love to tear people down, but I really wasn’t expecting the amount of vitriol that has been unleashed.

Career or Kids?

Skimming through some recent articles and comments, it’s hard to ignore the shamefully predictable onslaught of abuse that she has received. And it almost exclusive relates to her maternal status. Lots of the comments were undoubtedly from ‘Directioners’ still licking their Liam sized wounds that she nicked him right from under their noses.  However, I do actually believe that a vast number of them will have been from adults and probably other mums too. Are they all just outraged that she is continuing to live a life so similar to the one she had BC?  Well, that’s an illusion anyway. She still gets poop under her fingernails when she’s changing a nappy and has baby vomit on her clothes. She may have more money and lots of help but she’s still a mum and still battles mum guilt like the rest of us.

We can have it all?

I worked out that she’s taken the same amount of time off as I did for maternity leave – yet I just can’t imagine ever walking back into the staffroom after my 10 months off and people judging me for not still being at home with my child! Why is it SO different for her? I know I was probably more conservatively dressed than Chezza on my first trip back into the classroom but come on, we’re both just making a living. Being a mum doesn’t always negate the need to be your own person or need to earn a living. If anything it stirs up a fire inside of you to want to be a better and more fulfilled person. For some of us that includes developing a career. Lots of us NEED to earn money to support our families too. Gone are the days when one average wage was enough to support a house and growing family. And let’s not forget many of us LIKE having a job! Jesus let’s not spread that around though – us mums aren’t supposed to admit to enjoying anything that doesn’t involve our kids!

Double Standards

And finally… amongst all of the rubbish I’ve read over the past week there was one startling thing missing.  Any criticism for Liam. He continues to travel and tour around the world, leaving Cheryl at home holding the baby. This is apparently fine though. Here’s a charming picture of him with a bottom being thrust into his crotch.

I’m struggling to see the difference between their performances if I’m honest. The main difference is there is no accompanying tweet telling HIM to bugger off back home and concentrate on being a daddy. There wouldn’t be though would there?

So… lets all just calm down a bit and back off us mums, eh? I’m sure she’s constantly judging and critiquing herself enough as a mum, without the rest of the world doing it too. Go Chezza. Do you, girl!

Holly, LL Southport x

12 responses to “Go home and take care of your kid!!”

  1. Toni Bourn says:

    Yes Holly!

    • Holly Benn says:

      Awww, Thanks girl 🙂 full of typos because I wrote it in such a tizz 🙂 oops! Xxxxx

  2. Alex says:

    People love to be haters behind their little screens!

  3. Emma Maddison says:

    I LOVE this!!!!!! xxx

  4. Af says:

    True, agree with all your points. Personally, I reckon Liam should spend more time with his offspring at home rather than gallivanting off. He’s left her holding the baby, he helped to make, and no, not a single word against him.

    • Holly Benn says:

      Couldn’t agree more! You’re very right – he should be caring for his young child and sharing in the parenting and I’m pretty sure given his tour, that he’s not! So sad – it’s time you never get back! xx

  5. Karen Rushworth says:

    Love this – well said my love! x x

  6. Elinor says:

    Well done Holly!! X

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